I often go to Kebun Wisata Pasir Mukti in Citeureup, Bogor. I have the most exciting experience when I have a short holiday in Kebun Wisata Pasir Mukti with my Senior High School Friends. We came to that place around at 10.00 am. We gathered at a small house. After all of us came, we ate branch together. After we had finished eating, we started talking about what we did in Senior High School. There is always something that makes Senior High School time so unforgettable. Next, we went to a mosque to pray zuhur. Then, we decided to go to flying fox zone. We chose flying fox which crossed a river. None of us wanted to do first, so I decided to do it. It made me nervous at the beginning, but it was so exciting. After that, we took a rest and had some ice cream. Finally, we went to a futsal field to take photos. That was the exciting experience, and it was so memorable.
: topic
: controlling idea
Amy, In the right picture, why your friend was kneel and bow the head (as in prayer)?
BalasHapus:D
he wanted to be the ball and the the other one as the player :D
BalasHapus@ami
BalasHapusi think when you use "around", you didn't need to use "at" again.
then, in this sentence
"After all of us came, we ate branch together.", you should use past perfect tense because there were 2 events, and one of them ends before the second happens.
so, I think that sentence should be "After all of us had come, we ate branch together."
correct me if I am wrong :)
G'd point, Heflin. U have to use past perfect, indeed:-)
BalasHapusWell Ami, it's really organized paragraph with developed TS and sufficient supporting details. Ur grammar is already excellent if we cope with the consistency, but u make and repeat the 'error' in writing "Senior High School". Why do u have to capitalize it? Remember the rule of common and proper noun, Am. If u do not mention in detail what senior high school is, u hafta keep it in small letter, ok. Avoid the 'lil things next time, ok. Good`paragraph.